Advice on Saving Money and Avoiding Being Manipulated into Spending it Unwisely

The Main Contents

Part One
Some Tricks Salespeople Use to Persuade People to Part With Money

There are several techniques that salesmen often use to entice people to buy what they're selling. That doesn't mean they're all out to get one up on customers, or anything like that; but some are more cynical than others. Being wise to the fact that their main interest is likely to be to make a profit can save people money, by sparing them from falling for manipulative profit-making techniques that they might sometimes fall for otherwise.

Giving an Impression of Quality

When it comes to valuable goods, rather than hunting for a bargain, some people tend to look for something expensive. For instance, when buying an engagement ring, to a lot of men, the price they pay for it might symbolise the value they place on the relationship they have with their girlfriend, so if she means a lot to them, they'll want to pay a lot for the ring to demonstrate that. Or they might want to do it because they know it's expected of them, or because they want to please their girlfriend and her family, or they don't want to disappoint them if they expect something pricy.

Or sometimes, buying something expensive can be like buying into the feel-good factor of having a status symbol or something of quality. To give another example, champagne might not in reality taste better than a lot of other drinks; but people are willing to pay a lot more for it, because it can make a special occasion feel more special.

The trouble is that some people who sell such things know a lot of people think like that, and use it to their advantage, putting the price up on goods that aren't in reality any more valuable than other goods they're selling, just so people will think they're special and be more likely to buy them.

For instance, a whisky manufacturer apparently once found that one brand of whisky wasn't selling very well, and made it much more expensive. Then it started selling much better.

People assume that if something's more expensive it's of better quality, because that is very often the case. But business people sometimes take advantage of people's assumptions. So it's as well to judge a thing by other qualities too, and not place too much value on the price, at least when the price is particularly high.

Contrasting a Price With the Price of Something More Expensive, and Tricking People into Thinking They're Paying Less for Something Than It's Worth

Some salespeople play on people's greed.

There was a tailor's shop in the 1930s where people were shown suits by someone who pretended to have a hearing problem, and kept asking them to speak up. When a man saw one he liked, and asked the price, the tailor would shout across the room to a colleague, asking how much it cost. The colleague would praise the suit, and say it had an expensive price because it was of such quality. He would name a price. The tailor with the man would ask him to give the price again. Then he would give the man a price as if he thought he was repeating what his colleague had said, but in fact, the price he gave was only about half the price that had been shouted across the room. A lot of men wouldn't stop to think about whether they really wanted it, but would buy the suit quickly and get out of the shop as quickly as they could, hoping to have gone by the time the tailor discovered he'd given the wrong price. Of course, the tailor had really given the real price.

In some clothes shops, staff are instructed that if someone comes in and says he'd like a three-piece suit and a sweater, they should show him the suit first, because after he's seen the price of that, the price of anything smaller will seem cheap by comparison, so he's more likely to be tempted to buy it; even an expensive sweater will seem less expensive than it would have done if he'd been told the price at first, because he'll be automatically comparing it with the price of the suit. If you've just bought something for £300, £40 might seem quite cheap, even if it would have seemed so expensive at first it might have put you off buying it.

But if shown a cheap thing first, a more expensive thing might seem off-puttingly pricy by comparison.

So apparently in a lot of shops, the assistant will show customers the most expensive things of the kind they want to buy first. If they buy them, all well and good. If they don't, cheaper things might seem more acceptably priced by comparison, so they might feel encouraged to buy some of those.

If someone from a charity you regularly donate to phones you up and asks if you'll be willing to increase the amount you donate by £50, or another large sum, you might well refuse. They'll likely be expecting that, though if you don't refuse, all well and good for them. But they'll likely be asking you to donate an unreasonable amount first, so when they lower their request to another amount, it'll seem more reasonable and less of a burden than it would have done if they'd just come straight out and asked for it out of the blue, because you'll be comparing it with the number they've just mentioned, rather than nothing.

It's similar to a tactic people such as door-to-door salesmen can use, asking for a price for something they're trying to sell that you'll likely refuse because it's way too high at first, and then telling you they're willing to reduce it for you, so you end up thinking they've done you a favour, and the price doesn't seem so bad in the end, because you're comparing it with the high price you heard at first. So people can buy something in the end, feeling obliged to the salesman because they think he's done them a favour by reducing the price, which will sound like a better price than they would have thought it did if it had been the first price mentioned so they would have been judging it at face value, rather than comparing it to a higher price.

That doesn't mean anyone who offers something at a fairly high price and then reduces it will be using a trick. But it's best to be aware that it's possible, and think of the price they're offering at face value, rather than comparing it with what you were told it was at first.

Perhaps most estate agents don't do that. But when being asked for a high price for anything at all, or when shown two things where one compares a lot more favourably with the other, it's worth bearing in mind that that kind of tactic might be being used.

Apparently, some car salesmen use the tactic of selling a basic car first, and then selling accessories to go in it one by one. Since each accessory will be much much cheaper than the car - perhaps a few hundred pounds/dollars etc. as opposed to the tens of thousands the car might be being sold for, it might seem very cheap by comparison, so a person can happily agree to buy quite a few. Only when they've bought several accessories one by one, each one seeming quite cheap, will they be presented with the final bill, which might be astonishingly expensive, because it's all been added up, whereas they were mistakenly just thinking of the price of each individual thing, as the salesman offered it.

They'll often probably blame themselves for spending too much, since after all, they made the decisions to buy each thing. But the salesman will likely have been using the tactic in the knowledge that a lot of people fall for it, which is why it's used. After all, it's his job to sell as many things as he can.

Manipulating People into Feeling Like Spending Money out of Goodwill

Another thing about human nature that some profiteers or others trying to make money take advantage of is people's tendency to feel indebted or kindly towards someone who's given them something or done a favour for them, often feeling compelled to do something for them in return. On the whole, it's nice that people tend to feel like that, because it could mean people get helped with things more. But some salesmen and others use it to their advantage.

For instance, some charities send people gifts such as free Christmas cards to give people. It might seem like a waste of their money, but studies have found that they tend to get more donations when they give something first, which is why a lot of them do it. Perhaps it's something to do with the fact that a lot of people will feel mean using what they've been given if they don't give something in return. For instance, if someone uses a pen that comes from a particular charity, and another person sees them and asks them if that means they give to that charity, they might feel embarrassed if they say no, feeling as if they're unfairly taking advantage of the charity's goodness, taking from them and not giving, even though they didn't ask for the gift in the first place.

In the 1970s, the Hare Krishna organisation - basically a cult - used to try to get money by sending members out into public places like airports to beg for donations. They would bob and chant in unison, and they were strangely dressed, with shaven heads. Most people ignored them, thinking they were weird.

But their donations dramatically increased when they changed their strategy - they started approaching people one-to-one. They would give them flowers, and then ask for a donation. Even when people didn't want the flowers, they'd often give them money. Perhaps it was partly because of a warm-hearted feeling that made them think the giver meant well or was being sweet, so they were happy to do a favour in return; or they might have felt mean refusing; or often it might have been to do with them being in a hurry to catch a plane, or eagerly anticipating meeting waiting loved ones after they'd got in from a flight, and not wanting to waste time arguing over the fairness of refusing a donation, or whether the organisation was worth giving to; but people would often give, even if they just threw the flower away afterwards, which many did.

People from the organisation could be sent round to get them out of the bins so they could be given out again.

And if anyone said they didn't want the flower, they would insist they took it, saying it was a gift.

The organisation ended up with so much money, they built new temples. But soon people got wise to them and went out of their way to avoid them, or complained about them, and they were banned from certain places, and they had to close many of their temples down because they didn't have the money to keep them anymore.

Even politicians have voted for policies they strongly disagreed with, because they thought they owed a favour to someone who wanted them. Or they were worried they'd never do any favours for them again if they didn't. That could be dangerous in the worst cases, such as if a president wants to start an unwise war. It would likely be hard to get people to admit to being influenced by favours; but it's been found that politicians who'd been able to do others favours have received support from people who didn't agree with them.

Some businesses make use of giving gifts and favours in the hope of getting more sales. Giving free samples is apparently sometimes an enticement to buy a product there and then, and sometimes even people who don't like the product much will buy some after sampling it, perhaps because they don't want to disappoint the nice person giving out the free samples, or it seems mean just taking something and walking away, or they tried it in the first place because a feeling of greed made them want something free, but then when asked if they'd like to buy some, their consciences prick them. For whatever reason, it's often a good sales strategy, if the product is right there to buy, and there's someone there asking people if they'd like to.

Some door-to-door salespeople have found their sales increase when they've given people free samples to try, and been back days later to ask if they liked them and wanted to buy any. People who had no need of such products when the salesman came round might buy them, perhaps sometimes because they feel guilty about having used them without intending to buy any, thinking it must make them look as if they were just taking advantage of the salesperson's goodwill, or perhaps because they thought it would be easier than risking an argument. But though certainly not in all cases, sometimes it can have been a deliberate sales strategy by a company who knows people will have reactions like that.

So people should never feel obligated to buy anything they don't really want because of what seems to be the generosity of a person they meet. For all they know, it might sometimes have been the plan.

A young woman couldn't start her car one day, and a young man came over and helped her. She was grateful, and as he was leaving, she said that if he ever wanted a favour, he could drop by and ask her. A month later, he knocked on her door and asked if he could borrow her car for two hours, saying his was being repaired. She let him. Later on she couldn't understand why she'd done it. He wrecked it, and it later turned out he was underage, and didn't have insurance. It seemed her good impression of the man and her feeling of gratitude towards him, or her sense of fairness, had spurred her to want to help him or repay the favour, especially since she'd said she would; and the surprise of his request coming out of the blue wouldn't have given her time to think much about it anyway; and those things might have stopped her feeling so dubious about the request and thinking things through carefully, - although she was a bit uncertain at the time, because he looked so young and her car was quite new.

That kind of thing could perhaps happen to anyone. But people can reduce the chances by being aware that it could happen, so they can bear it in mind when people make requests of them. Of course, that doesn't mean people should err on the side of refusing requests, or offers of favours, since a lot might be made with the best of intentions. But it's often best to be cautious about doing so just like that, with people whose motives are unclear.

Young women are sometimes advised not to accept gifts from men showing interest in them, since the men might be giving them with the intention of asking for sex later, using guilt-tripping techniques to get it if they're not successful at first, claiming it's only fair since they've paid for gifts.

Drug companies sometimes send representatives around to doctors and give them little gifts while talking about the drugs they supply. They can find that doctors start prescribing their drugs in preference to other drugs, perhaps partly because they feel favourably towards the company or indebted towards them, and partly because their drugs are the ones uppermost in their minds because they've been the ones they've most recently been hearing about the benefits of.

If you actually want someone to help you in some way, you might increase your chances if you offer them something first in hopes of motivating them.

It's Best Not to Agree to Things Before Really Thinking About it

Agreeing to anything on the spur of the moment can leave a person with more than they bargained for, even when the person asking for or offering something isn't a salesman, and seems friendly and well-intentioned. It's best not to agree to anything without first finding out exactly what's being offered, and if anything's being expected in return.

To give an amusing, very minor example, a woman one day happened to mention to another that she'd been given some berries to eat by a family member, and wondered if they'd be nice or a bit tart. The other woman said she had some yoghurts, and asked if she'd like one to mix with the berries, to make them taste nicer if they were a bit tart. The first woman said that could be nice. The second woman brought it to her a couple of days later, when she'd actually eaten most of the berries, having found them surprisingly pleasantly sweet, not needing to be accompanied by anything to make them taste better after all, and had virtually forgotten she'd been offered a yoghurt. The yoghurt she was given was about eight times the size she'd imagined it would be, and the second woman expected her to pay for it, which she hadn't mentioned before.

The first woman wondered what to do with it, there was so much! But then she ate some and liked it. So she decided to buy more fruit and more yoghurts to mix together. She bought five yoghurts, with enough fruit to match.

Meanwhile, the other woman asked her one day, while she had her mind on other things, whether she'd like her to buy her a yoghurt whenever she got herself one from a particular shop she liked, which she'd often praise as a cheap supermarket where great bargains could be had. She'd said she didn't go there all that often. The first woman thought on the spur of the moment that that sounded like an appealing idea and agreed.

The second woman didn't tell her when she was going to that shop. Unexpectedly one day, not long after the first woman had bought the five yoghurts, the second one knocked on her door, bringing two more, which she expected payment for. So the first woman ended up with seven! She realised she'd have to gently discourage the other woman from buying things unexpectedly like that, and told her she'd get any she wanted herself in future, after she discovered the ones from the supposedly cheap supermarket were in reality no cheaper than the ones from the one she normally shopped in.

Making it Look as if Products are Recommended by Trusted People

Door-to-door salesmen sometimes increase their sales a lot by using the strategy of seeming reasonable by just accepting it when a person doesn't want to buy something, but then asking for the names of neighbours, friends and family who might be interested. And they can ask their names too when people particularly like one of their products. People who'd never usually give a stranger the names of their friends and family, and wouldn't think of themselves as people who'd happily burden their friends and family by suggesting that salesmen call on them, will sometimes give names of people close to them, partly because they've been surprised by the request so they don't have time to think through whether to or not, and partly because they feel that the salesman has been reasonable to them in not continuing to nag them to buy something, so they feel they want to return the favour.

Then when the salesman goes to their friends or family, they give the name of the person who suggested they go there, saying they sent them. Then because the friends or family members think the salesman's products must be recommended by them, they're more likely to buy some. Then the salesman can ask the names of their own friends, family and neighbours, and try selling to them, and they themselves are more likely to buy because they've been told they were sent by a friend or family member, and so on, with the salesman building up a never-ending supply of names of people to contact and mention the name of a friend or family member to to increase confidence in them and influence them to buy. It's more difficult to refuse to buy when a person thinks a friend recommended the product.

One effective sales technique is where people are actually recruited to sell things to their friends, plus others in their neighbourhoods. People can buy something a friend will profit by out of loyalty to them, even if they're not that keen on the product. Also some people can have more confidence in a product's worth if they're sold it by someone they trust, even if that person in reality hasn't used it themselves so they don't know how good it is.

Increasing Sales by Making Efforts to Seem More Likeable

Some salesmen also use strategies to get people to like them, so they're more likely to buy from them because they feel friendly towards them. Companies tend to want physically attractive people to do the selling or meet and greet the public when they come in; they know it makes a better impression. So many will give their staff tips on improving their looks, and it's often likely to be the good-looking people who get the jobs where making a quick good impression on the public matters most.

Or they can dress and look similar to those they intend to approach, in the hope that they'll identify with them more, so they'll think of them more as someone they can trust to buy things from. Or they make themselves seem similar in other ways, for instance by asking people about things they've done, and then telling them they have various things in common with them, such as similar holiday destinations they've been on, that'll likely make them feel more friendly towards them and confident in them because they're on more familiar terms.

To give an example, car salesmen are often trained to look for things about the customer that they have in common with while examining an old car they've brought in to give them in part-exchange for a new one. If a salesman notices some camping gear in the back, they might comment later on how they love to get away from town for a break from time to time. If they notice some golf balls in the old car, they might comment that they hope the rain stays away till they can play the game of golf they're looking forward to playing later on. If the subject of what part of the country the customer bought the old car in comes up, the salesman might ask them where they're from, and then tell them with apparent surprise that they or a family member of theirs was born there. If the salesman starts to come across more like a kindred spirit than an official representing some company, then people can instinctively trust them more and have goodwill towards them, so they can be more likely to buy from them. Some companies know that.

In fact, quite a lot of training courses for salesmen now teach them to even match the body posture, apparent mood, and the way they talk and expressions they use to that of customers, since again, customers can feel as if they can trust someone who is like them in such ways better, because their confidence in them is increased because they seem more like them.

Apparently, there was a study that found that people were more likely to buy insurance when the salesman selling it to them was like them in age, religion, politics and cigarette-smoking habits. Another researcher sent out a survey, and found that quite a few more people responded to it when they changed their name to make it similar to the name of each person they were sending the survey to. So, for instance, if the name of one person they sent one to was Robert Greer, they wrote a letter with the questions, and signed it Bob Gregar. When sending to someone called Cynthia Johnston, they changed their name to Cynthie Johanson. Two studies where that was done found that nearly twice as many people sent the questionnaires back filled in when they were sending them to people whose names were similar to theirs.

Salesmen can also look out for opportunities to praise and flatter customers, and give them the impression they like them, since people can warm to people a lot if they're told they like them, and then they can be more willing to listen to what they say, and do what they want.

There was a study where each one of a group of men was spoken to by someone who wanted them to do them a favour. Some of the men just received praise, some received a mixture of positive and negative comments, and some were criticised. Then the men were asked if they liked the person. The people who'd received only praise and flattery liked them best. This was the case even when the men knew the person wanted a favour, so they knew there was a possibility that they could have been praising them to manipulate them. It was also the case when they were well aware that the praise wasn't accurate. It didn't make any difference. It still made them feel good, and that made them like the person giving the praise better.

So when a salesman gives a compliment, it's worth bearing in mind that it might be designed to bring on a feeling of liking that creates more willingness to buy the product.

While it's nice to be complimented, and to feel that someone's a pleasure to do business with, people should always weigh up whether what the person's trying to sell's really worth the price, and whether its features are genuinely good, and whether they're what they actually want; some features can be very good, but they'll be a waste of money if they'll be rarely used, and worse if they could possibly contribute to something that could cause a hazard, such as something in a car that might be nice, but that could lead to a driver's concentration being taken away from the road, perhaps because they're looking at it for several seconds every so often instead of looking at what's happening on the road in front of them.

People also warm to people who seem to be on their side, working with them towards something they both want. Allies tend to be trusted more than strangers. So salesmen often act as if they're allies with the customer, teaming up against the boss to get them a better deal than the boss would like them to have. So they win the customer's confidence, and the customer will likely instinctively feel like co-operating with them in signing the deal.

But in reality, the boss will be in on what the salesman's doing - it'll be an act, part of company strategy to increase sales. It will have been part of the salesman's training. The salesman, while pretending to try to coax the boss to lower the price, will know beforehand what the lowest price is that the boss is willing to sell at, and he won't try to make the boss offer a lower one than that; he'll start by offering the customer a higher one, and then he'll pretend the boss is reluctant to reduce it but he's trying to persuade him. He might keep going into the boss's office, saying that's what he's going there to do, while in reality, they might not even be saying a word to each other there. The salesman might come out looking tired, as if he's put a lot of effort into persuading the boss to reduce the price, but in reality he might have just had a cigarette there.

Manipulating People Into Associating a Product With Something They Get Pleasure Out of

Salesmen and advertisers often also do their best to make people feel a liking for what they're trying to sell by finding ways to influence them to make a subtle connection in their minds between that and something they already like, which can work even when they don't realise the connection's being made. They're more likely to find a thing appealing if it reminds them of something they like.

So, for instance, adverts for cars often feature scantily-clad models, in the hope that men's attention will be drawn to the adverts by them, and that it'll mean that men will get good feelings when they look at cars at their local dealer's that are like the one being advertised, so they're more likely to buy them.

And when some things become popular, they're more likely to be used in adverts for similar reasons. At around the time when men were first landing on the moon, for instance, apparently a lot of adverts started featuring things that had to do with the moon landing - though many of the products being advertised had nothing to do with the moon, like breakfast cereals or deodorants. The hope was that the enthusiasm people had for the moon landings would automatically cause them to feel drawn to the product - that people would start to get good feelings when they thought of it too, so they'd feel as if they have more liking for it; or they hoped that at least the adverts would get people's attention more; or the advertisers thought the product would become more memorable, and thus it would stand out more to people in the shops, because it was associated with a memorable event.

Increasing the Reputation of a Product by Inducing a Famous Person to Advertise it

Advertisers also know that if an authority figure or celebrity claims that a product's good, people will take notice, and a lot will likely be persuaded it's worth buying, just because the authority figure or celebrity praised it. Perhaps a lot of people believe that people with reputations to uphold wouldn't stake them on a product that isn't good. Or perhaps people in authority are assumed to know a lot more about what they're talking about than ordinary members of the public, which of course is often the case, at least on subjects they've been trained in. But apparently, even actors who've played medical doctors in television programmes have influenced a lot of people to buy a product when they've recommended it in an advert.

Dressing Like an Authority Figure to Increase Trust

Unfortunately, con artists often give themselves the appearance of authority figures, because they know people will be impressed, even a bit awed, and more trusting of someone who's an authority figure, than they might be of people in general, so they're more likely to be influenced by them. Some drive good-quality pricy cars, dress to impress, and give themselves titles like 'doctor' or 'professor' or 'commissioner' and such-like. They know people will take titles like that to be symbols of expertise and knowledge gained over the years. They'll likely assume that someone with a title like that's a learned person, deserving of respect, without giving it any thought.

Another symbol of authority that conmen, salesmen and the like can use to their advantage is the way they dress. They know the immediate impression made by their clothes counts for a lot; people will make assumptions about them before they even say hello. They might assume that someone dressed in a smart suit will be more sensible, educated, honourable and trustworthy than someone dressed scruffily. So conmen know they'll gain respect they don't deserve just by dressing nicely.

Or sometimes they disguise themselves as someone who people tend to respect by wearing the uniform of a person like a policeman, a priest, a hospital staff member or an army officer. People will naturally assume that someone working in an official capacity has more right to tell them what to do than most people have.

There was even a study that found that if someone's dressed like an authority figure and they step out into traffic when the lights are red, a lot more people will follow them across the road than they will if they're dressed in an ordinary way. Authority figures might have a greater reputation for wisdom than the public in general, but that doesn't mean they will always have more, or that where they do have, their judgments will always be good.

One example of a con some people have used to steal money is where men pretend to be bank officials. They find it most profitable to pick on old people who live alone. One will sometimes go to the house of one - perhaps one he secretly followed home from the bank not long before, - dressed in a smart business suit that makes him look the part - respectable and important. He can say he's been working for the bank and has detected some fraud committed by someone at the bank who's been taking money from people's accounts, and wants to see if the person's account is one of the ones he's tampering with. He'll say the people at the bank think it is, but they need hard evidence, so they'd like the person to withdraw their savings, so a group of responsible bank staff can monitor the fraudulent bank official's activities at the very moment when it happens, to see if they change the report of the transaction, for instance changing it so the records say the money's been transferred into their own account, rather than being withdrawn by its owner.

The conman's smart clothes make him seem more trustworthy. A lot of people do what he wants. They go to the bank with the man and withdraw their savings. Then the con artist who's pretending to be the bank official waits with the person in their home, and later, after the bank's closed, another smartly-dressed person saying he's a bank official comes in, and says he's pleased to say that the person's bank account has been found not to be one of the ones being tampered with. The first con artist expresses relief, and asks the second one to put the money back in the bank himself, saying it'll be nice because the bank's now closed, and it'll save the householder the trouble of putting it back themselves the next day. The man agrees, and there are thanks and handshakes all around, and he leaves, followed a few minutes later by the first con artist.

Victims eventually realise they've been scammed, when they discover the money hasn't been put back in their account.

There are quite a few variations of the scheme, some carried out over the phone.

In reality, banks don't ask customers to help with their investigations. And if anyone claims to come from an official organisation asking to do something that makes a person at all uncomfortable, they ought to question it, and phone a number for the organisation the person claims to come from that they themselves already have, or can get hold of without asking the person who's contacted them for it, and ask if they sent them.

Giving an Impression of Honesty and Friendliness

Something else some salesmen and other such people do to gain customers' trust so they're more likely to buy from them is to give the impression of honesty, by drawing attention to a minor shortcoming of the product they're selling. People tend to assume they wouldn't do that if they were really just out for themselves and trying to make a fast buck. In reality, they do it to increase customers' trust in them, so as to make it more likely that they'll buy from them. The customer will assume they're giving a fair representation of what the product's really like, since after all, they're mentioning disadvantages as well as advantages. But the shortcoming they mention will always be a minor one, which will be significantly outweighed by benefits they then talk about.

The technique was observed by one author in an expensive restaurant, where one waiter made a lot more money from tips and bill money that he got a percentage of than the rest of them did. The author discovered he had several tactics, that he selected according to whom he was talking to; but one was to give bits of what seemed helpful advice: He used it when there were fairly large groups of people at a table together. When the first one ordered - usually a woman, - he'd behave in the same way whatever she wanted: He'd furrow his brow, his hand would hover above his order pad, and after looking quickly over his shoulder to see if the manager was within earshot, he'd lean conspiratorially towards the table, and say for everyone sitting at it to hear, "I'm afraid that's not as good tonight as it normally is. Might I recommend instead the ... or the ...? They are both excellent tonight." He'd select a couple of dishes from the menu that were slightly less expensive than the one the person had selected.

By doing just that one thing, he'd engaged several techniques of influence: He'd make them think he was on their side and honest, and they'd feel like doing him a favour in return for the one they thought he'd just done them. Even those who didn't take his advice would feel grateful to him for wanting to help. They'd get the impression that he wasn't out to just persuade them to buy the more expensive things, but wanted the best quality for them. That worked in his favour later, not just because they liked him better so they gave him a bigger tip, but because they trusted him to know what was good, and thought he was on their side, so when it came time to order the wine, when he recommended some choices that were good but expensive, they tended to choose one of them. Also he found it easier to persuade them to have dessert - people who wouldn't normally have it or who'd usually share with a friend would have their own, persuaded by his enthusiastic descriptions of the deliciousness of certain ones, and their trust that he knew what he was talking about.

It's been found that people can use a similar tactic to good effect in other settings: One study found that people applying for jobs who put one minor shortcoming amid an otherwise wholly positive description of themselves were more likely to get jobs.

Advertising What Seems to be a Great Deal, Only to Change it When Customers Have Become Interested

Salesmen and other such people know that if they seem to be offering a good deal and a favour to the customer at first, even if it doesn't really exist, they'll draw in customers. A businessman told of his experience when he wanted to sell his car. He saw a sign advertising good deals for used cars. He went in and said he was thinking of selling his car for about $3000. They told him they thought it was worth a lot more. He was sure it wasn't, but liked the idea of getting more money for it, so he decided to ask $3500 for it. He was surprised, because the more they bought the car for, the less profit they'd be able to make from it. He thought that they must be honest, good people that he could trust if they were willing to reduce their own profits to do him the favour of getting him a better deal for his car.

After they'd had the car for a couple of days, they phoned him and told him they had a buyer who wanted to have the car, but only at a lower price, so they asked him if he was willing to sell it for $200 less. He thought that since they were trustworthy people, they must still have his interests at heart, so he agreed. The next day, he got a phone call from them, saying the buyer's finances had fallen through, so he couldn't buy it after all.

In the next two weeks, the same thing happened twice more - they phoned him saying they had a buyer who'd love the car but for $200 less, to which he agreed, but the day after, they phoned him saying the deal had fallen through. Then he became suspicious. He phoned an old friend whose family was in the car business. The friend said it was an old trick, designed to get sellers to reduce their prices to super-low levels, giving the dealership big profits when they finally did sell the car.

So he went back to the dealership and got his car. As he left, they were still trying to persuade him to let them keep it, saying they had a "hot prospect" who they were sure would buy it if he only allowed them to knock off another $200.

The salesmen may also have been using the contrast principle to persuade him - asking him to drop the price in comparatively small amounts each time, in the hope that after the $3500 they'd offered to sell it for, $200 wouldn't sound much, so he'd think little of allowing them to drop the price by that amount each time.

Taking Advantage of Pester Power

Another thing salespeople and the like can exploit is people's sense of honour, and their tendency to give in to "pester power". For instance, some toy manufacturers have had a problem after Christmas, because parents aren't in the mood to buy more toys for their children for some time afterwards, so toys sales can really slump. They've managed to get around the problem by creating a longing in some children for a particular expensive toy, by putting out attractive adverts for it before Christmas, so lots of children clamour for it, and parents promise to buy it. Then they deliberately understock the shops with it, so a lot of parents won't be able to get it. So they get their children other expensive toys for Christmas instead. After Christmas, the toy manufacturers restock the shops with the toy, and put out the adverts again. The children remind their parents they promised to buy it for them; and rather than feel they've let their children down, and possibly to avoid a big fuss, they go and buy it.

When the author of a book on the ways people can be influenced to buy things was told about the technique, he'd just bought his child an expensive toy after falling for it, and was so angry, he wanted to take it right back to the shop. But the person who told him about the trick pointed out that that would be like punishing the child for something the toy manufacturers had done. So he didn't.

Instead, it's worth thinking of ways of relieving the pressure of "pester power" from children who've just seen adverts for things. For instance, it can be explained to them that just because something's advertised, it doesn't mean it's the best thing; there might be lots of things that are better than that, but people don't know about them because they're not being advertised, as if they're being kept as an exciting mystery. It can be explained that companies don't advertise because their product's the best one, but because they've got the money to buy time on television or radio to advertise what they're selling, and they want to increase the amount of the products they sell. But no one can find out about a product's real qualities and faults from an advert; there might be other things around that are far better.

And even if friends have already got or been promised the product, so the child's worried about feeling left out, they can be asked to think about why it's important to have one just because friends have them, and about the benefits of having something different, so there's a bigger variety of things to play with; perhaps the child will be allowed to play with the friend's toy and the friend with theirs if they've got something different, if they're trusted.

Manipulating People's Desire Not to Look or Feel Foolish

Another human trait some salesmen play on is people's desire not to look foolish. If they get people to sign up for something, physically putting their own signature - which signifies their public stamp of commitment - on it, then afterwards, even if people realise they made a foolish decision because they got carried away or bowed to pressure, and spent too much money, they can feel too concerned about looking a fool to change their minds about wanting it and admit the mistake. But it's worth bearing in mind that even if you'll feel a fool changing your mind and admitting you were wrong, if you don't, the salesman might well be smilingly thinking you're foolish for buying the thing and sticking to your decision. He might simply think of it as a victory for him.

Offering to Sell a Product Deceptively Cheaply

Some car salesmen deceptively entice customers to buy a car from their garage rather than from another one by at first offering a car below the price they really intend to sell it at - some way below the prices of their competitors, by perhaps a few hundred pounds/dollars and so on, enough that it'll seem a bargain. When the customer agrees to buy it, they get them to fill out forms to say so, and might even let them try out the car for a day or so before making the final commitment to buy, suggesting they show it around the neighbourhood and at work. All the while the customer shows it off, their fondness for the car will be growing, and others might admire it, making them pleased, and they'll be beginning to think of it as theirs.

The salesman might spend some time negotiating with them about how and what they're going to pay. After that though, the salesman can say there's been a problem. Sometimes he'll say he forgot to add in the price of a certain item - perhaps the air conditioning; or he'll say the boss won't sell it at that price after all because they'd be losing money, but he will sell it at a more expensive price (which is actually the price they'd intended to sell it at all along).

Sometimes they let the bank that's handling the transaction find the supposed error they made in the calculations of what it would cost, so the customer won't be suspicious of them.

Offering a Deceptively Good Deal

Sometimes, the salesman will have offered them an extraordinarily good price for their old car in part-exchange for the new one, to entice them to sell it at their garage rather than to a competitor; and though the customer knows it's more than it's really worth, they'll often jump at the chance of such a good deal. Then after they've set their heart on buying a particular new car from the salesman's garage, his manager will apologise, and say a mistake was made, and they meant to offer a lower price for the customer's car. The customer won't usually object, because they know the deal they were originally offered was more than their car was worth anyway. Some customers even apologise for having wanted to take advantage of the unfair deal.

Because the person has begun to think of the new car as theirs and become attached to it, they might be proud because people have complimented them on how nice it looks, and it would seem downright tiresome to go through the process of going back to square one - looking around for another car, and filling out all those forms and negotiating about what payment method they'll use, and also because in contrast with the price of the car -tens of thousands, a few hundred more pounds etc. doesn't seem so much, they'll often just agree to take it and pay the extra amount now being asked. The salesman might say that after all, they're only paying the same price as they'd pay for a similar car if they went to one of their competitors, and that after all, they did choose that car.

Making public commitments to things can work for good as well as being something salesmen can manipulate. For instance, if people feel accountable for their decisions because they've made some kind of public demonstration of them, they're less likely to go back on them, and people can use that to their own advantage: For instance, if they want to give up some kind of addiction or bad habit, if they tell several people they care about that they're going to do their best never to do it again, if they care that a lot of people will be disappointed in them or think less of them if they do and are found out, they'll often be more likely to stick to their commitment.

A restaurant owner reduced the number of people who caused a nuisance by reserving tables and then not showing up a lot by telling the receptionists to use a very slight change of wording on the phone to them: They used to say, "Please call us if you change your plans". But they changed it to phrase it as a question they waited for the answer to: "Please will you call us if you change your plans?" It meant that people had the choice of whether to say yes or no. Almost everyone would likely say yes so as not to sound awkward. And in making the 'yes' choice, it's as if they were making themselves responsible for doing what they said they'd do, so they would feel obliged to keep their word. There was an immediate effect - far fewer people didn't bother turning up for meals after reserving tables.

Some charities have increased their donations by playing on people's emotions, such as their reluctance to feel foolish and ashamed by going back on their word. For instance, the children's charity in Britain, the NSPCC, sent out a letter to people, not asking for a donation, but simply asking people to sign the letter if they wanted child abuse to stop, and send it back. Well there hopefully aren't many people who wouldn't want child abuse to stop! But weeks later, the charity sent everyone a letter, asking them to donate money to help stop child abuse. People who'd signed up to a statement saying they'd like child abuse to stop may well have felt as if they would be going back on their word somehow or contradicting themselves if they didn't donate, as if it would mean they didn't want it to stop after all. So really, the NSPCC were using a psychological tactic to get money, playing on people's desire not to feel bad about themselves.

Apparently, someone doing a job for the American Cancer Society did something similar - he phoned people up and simply asked them to predict how they'd respond if someone asked them to spend a few hours going door to door collecting donations for them. Most people said they would, many probably because they didn't want the embarrassment and shame of looking uncharitable by saying no. A few weeks later, a representative from the American Cancer Society rang them all, and asked if they would arrange to go out collecting donations. Many many more people than normal agreed to go. It was likely because having said they'd go, they'd feel foolish and dishonourable and perhaps a bit like people who'd been caught lying if they then refused.

Scaring People Into Buying

It's all very well for charities to want to increase donations; but sometimes, salesmen pretend to be doing charitable things to get people interested in what they're selling, such as if they're from companies selling home security systems or equipment to make daily tasks easier for elderly people who can't care for themselves as easily as they used to. They might phone up and simply ask people if they'd like them to come around and advise them on how safe their home is, or of things that could help them. But when they're there, they could go into detail about the defects of their home security or of accidents that could possibly happen to them at first, and then go into a high-pressure sales technique for hours, trying to convince the home owner it's essential to buy their particular equipment to be safe.

It might be tempting for the elderly person to buy from them just to get rid of them, or because of the convenience of being able to get something right then and there, or out of fear of what could happen, after it's been stirred up by the salesman. But the decision could be very expensive.

One persuasion technique the salesman might use is lowering the price gradually, even phoning up the boss to try and get a special concession. But it will likely be just a sales tactic; the price quoted at first will have been way above what the product's really being sold for, and it'll be being reduced towards the real price, which the elderly person will be being told is a discount, to make it sound more and more attractive.

Or if someone knocks on the door, and says something like, "I couldn't help noticing your drive's in a bit of a state. It could damage your car if it gets much worse. I'll be happy to fix it for you if you like", it might seem nice that he's concerned, and convenient that you could just sign up to have it mended right there and then without having to bother searching for a good company; but the wish for convenience could come at a high price; the saving of half an hour or so on the Internet looking for companies with good reputations and affordable prices could cost not just in terms of money, but in terms of a possible far greater inconvenience if they do a shoddy job or do half of it, take some money and disappear with the drive in a mess.

Increasing Goodwill by Flattering Customers

Some salespeople draw customers in to make a purchase partly by flattering them in some way, and saying things that appeal to their vanity or sense of goodwill or something else. For instance, if someone says something flattering to a person, and then asks if they'd be willing to help them by filling in a little survey or something, the person might feel compelled to help, especially since the person who flattered them seems nice and has said something nice to them so they feel like being nice in return. If after they've filled in the little survey, the person then asks if since they've expressed a liking for certain products in the survey, they'd like to purchase some from them, the person might feel silly saying no after they said they liked them, and still compelled in the back of their minds to help the person, since they seem nice, so they might buy some, while at the same time feeling reluctant, and as if they've been taken in.

What can stop them feeling pressured to buy by their own thoughts is if as soon as they're asked to part with money, they think something like, "Aha, this is just a sales trick! I don't need to feel beholden to or impressed by this person after all". Then the feelings that were compelling the person to part with money they didn't want to will likely go away.

Giving the Impression That a Product's Popular

Another sales technique is to give the impression that loads of people have bought what the salesman's selling - that it's really popular! Salesmen might tell a lot of stories about enthusiastic customers. But even if lots of people have bought it, that doesn't mean it's good. After all, how will they really know until after they've bought it? And a lot might be buying it simply because they've heard that lots of other people have! And lots of customers might be pleased to buy it, since they think it must be good; but what really matters is whether they think it was worthwhile getting after they've used it - and the salesman's unlikely to know that.

Creating an Urgency to Buy, Through Giving the Impression that Things Won't be Available for Long so People Need to Hurry if they Want Them

Creating an artificial scarcity by holding stocks back from the shops for a while, or pretending there's a shortage of them, is another thing that can sell products. If people think it might not be long before they can't get or do something, they'll likely think they'd better get or do it right away. Even products they wouldn't have bothered that much about can suddenly seem appealing if they think it might not be long before they'll never have the opportunity to get them again if they should ever decide they'd like to.

But it's worth people stopping to think about whether they really want them, since they might feel so much in a rush otherwise that they get them before thinking about whether in all honesty they'll like them, or make use of them, or whether they could get other things that offer more and are of better value. That sounds obvious; but people can make different decisions than the ones they imagine they will when they're in the situation, feeling the sway of emotions that compel them to do something. It's worth being on guard to recognise such emotions for what they are - the brain's instinct to take advantage of an opportunity to get instant gratification, before it's really thought things through.

Sometimes when salesmen say there are only a few things left in stock, or something similar, they're being truthful; but sometimes they're lying. There are several related techniques to hook the customer in:

One technique was witnessed by the author of a book about influence techniques while he was writing it, who noticed that in a shop that often seemed to have a lot on sale, the technique was especially well done:

If a couple seemed, from a distance, to be showing moderate interest in an item - having a closer-than-normal look, casually looking at the manual for a moment, having a discussion in front of it and so on, but not trying to find a salesman to find out further information, one would go up to them and tell them he wasn't surprised they were interested in the machine, since it was a great product at a great price, but unfortunately he'd just sold it to another couple not more than 20 minutes earlier, and he thought it was the last one. The customers would look disappointed. One would usually ask if it was possible that there might be another one in a back room or warehouse or somewhere else. The salesman would say it was possible. Then he'd say something like, "I'd be willing to check to see if there's one; But do I understand that this is the model you want and if I can get it for you at this price, you'll take it?"

Customers confronted by such a technique will likely think that if they say no, that's it - they won't get another one, because it sounds as if he'll only go to look for them if they're going to buy it. They'll likely not want to appear awkward or risk a confrontation by saying they'd like him to go and hunt one out only for them possibly not to buy it after they've looked at it some more, thinking to be considerate of his feelings and spare him effort. And they'll likely be surprised at being asked to make up their minds so quickly, so they don't feel they really have any time to make a thoughtful decision as to whether to buy it. Worried they won't get the opportunity to again, they'll often say yes.

The salesman gets the item, and comes back with a pen and sales contract already in his hand. Even if they've decided they'd rather not buy it while he's gone, again they won't want to feel awkward and embarrassed by saying they don't want it after all, especially since they committed to buy it in a public place, so they might worry about looking foolish in front of others. And they might feel nervous about a confrontation if they say they've changed their minds. And they still might think it would be a shame if their opportunity to get it just slipped away. So they'll likely just buy it.

When people recognise that kind of thing as a sales tactic, they have a better chance of defending against it. For instance, if someone's just looking at something they like and a salesman says it's just been sold out, they could say something like, "That's a shame. Oh well, perhaps we'll find something similar or better if we keep looking; we might find exactly the same thing in another shop, perhaps cheaper than this would have been too." And there's no need to feel awkward about sending the salesman on a trip to the back room to hunt another one out without feeling obligated to buy it if he offers to find another one and you'd quite like to buy but aren't sure; after all, it won't mean he has to work longer that day or anything like that; it's all just part of his job; if he wasn't doing that, he'd just be doing something else, perhaps something less useful. If he thinks there's a chance you'll buy, he's unlikely to refuse to go. And it wouldn't be a wasted journey in any case; he'd just put it out for someone else to buy.

Often, rather than saying there's only a limited number of a particular item in stock, a time limit will be advertised - often a special offer made on a product, but only till a certain date. The pleasure of getting it more cheaply than usual, and the pressure of knowing it won't be that price for long, can make some people rush to buy things they wouldn't normally be that interested in. But if they wait, regardless of what the advert said, chances are it'll be on special offer again soon. After all, retailers will often know it sells faster when it is. And if it isn't on offer again soon, something similar and perhaps better might well be found before too long.

People naturally like to have control over their circumstances. When they think something might soon slip from their grasp, their instincts will be to grab it. The same instincts kick in when people are told things will be available but only for a limited time, or that there aren't many around and so on; people can get a feeling of urgency to get something before it's lost, or a feeling of pleasure at being able to get a bargain while it's still possible. A lot of salesmen know that happens and play on it, creating the feeling deliberately, because they know it compels people to buy.

Some salesmen play on it to its greatest effect of all, when they meet customers face to face and put pressure on them to buy right then and there. They play on the customers' instincts to get something while it's still going by telling them that if they don't buy it right then and there, it might not be available any more, or it will be but at a higher price. Customers can be told that a deal being offered is a one-time offer, never to be available again, and that even if they leave the premises the deal's being offered on, that's the end of it. Or they play on customers' emotions in similar ways: Apparently one big photography company told families who'd had photos of their children taken to buy as many poses and copies of photos as they could quickly because space limitations meant they had to burn all pictures they took of children within 24 hours if they weren't sold.

Similarly, someone selling particular magazines door-to-door might tell people that salesmen will only be in the area for a day, so those who don't buy or subscribe within that time will lose their chance.

A door-to-door vacuum cleaner sales company that the author of the book on influencing people worked in for a little while would train its salesmen to tell customers they were too busy to see any customer more than once, so if they didn't buy then and there, it would be too late - even if they decided afterwards that they wanted a machine, they couldn't have one, because no one would be available to come back to sell them one. It was a nonsense claim - totally untrue, since if someone actually had decided later that they wanted one, the company would be all too willing to send someone round to sell one. The company sales manager told his trainees that the real reason they should tell customers they couldn't come back was to prevent people from thinking the deal over well, by worrying them into believing they'd better hurry up and make up their minds, otherwise it would be too late; so not wanting to lose their chance, and imagining their opportunity slipping away, customers would want the machine while they could get it, so they'd buy it.

Scammers can use people's reaction to the news that they'd better make up their minds quickly or they'll lose out on a great opportunity to swindle people out of a lot of money.

For instance, one scam in America involves someone phoning up, and not asking the person on the other end to buy anything, but just asking their permission to send them some literature on their offers. Later, they call and tell them about some supposedly great opportunities to invest in shares that could make them a lot of money, but then say they've just missed out on the opportunity. Later, a third caller phones up, and, often sounding out of breath, says it's not quite too late after all, since they've found an offer the person can take advantage of if they act right then. Some people have parted with their life's savings. The power of the scam comes from people's sense of urgency to get what was offered, and the fact they think they have to act quickly so they don't have time to think about it. They might be being swayed by powerful emotions of greed or desire not to lose out, like they thought they had at first when their appetite was wetted and then they were disappointed.

One way advertisers create a sense of urgency to buy is by wording adverts in a way that makes people feel as if there's a sense of urgency to buy something because so many other people want it that all the items will have been grabbed by others if they don't get a move on and get one. They say that demand is so great that people need to hurry. So people do, and then when others do likewise, they see loads of others going for the same thing, and their desire for it can become even stronger, because they think that if they don't get one soon, all the items they want will be gone. But really, there might be things that are just as good around that far fewer people are going for, because advertisers haven't created excitement about them.

Salesmen are taught to whip up a feeling of urgency through creating a feeling of competition with others if a customer's indecisive about buying something. For instance, an estate agent trying to sell a house to someone who isn't sure whether to buy and is taking their time deciding might call them to say that someone else has seen the house and is interested, and that they're going back there the next day to talk about buying it. The person might not really exist. The estate agent might make up details about them, such as saying they're rich and enthusiastic about buying. The thought of losing out to someone can turn someone who isn't that enthusiastic into someone who's really keen to get in first before the other one does, since there seems to be a hurry, and they think their chance will be gone soon. So they can buy quickly, regardless of what was making them hesitate before.

The very feeling of being in competition can stir up strong emotion and greater effort. So if advertisers create excitement about a sale in which they insist that things are bound to go fast, just feeling in competition with others who want the same thing can stir up the adrenaline and make people enthusiastic to get things first, when they might not even have been that interested in them otherwise.

Department stores attract interest in bargain sales by putting a few especially good things on sale that they call loss leaders, because they're the main attractions, but they're being sold so cheaply they're being sold at a loss, to draw customers into the store because of what a bargain they are. They're advertised well.

Once the customers are there, they'll likely assume that lots of other things are equally good bargains if they've been made eager by the advertising, and they'll see other people quickly taking things off the shelves, and think that if they don't hurry, they'll miss out; so people can apparently even run around snapping up things they haven't looked at at all that thoroughly before others who are hot on their trail can get them, only to wonder afterwards why they were so enthusiastic to buy lots of things they didn't really want. They'll have thought there was so much hurry to buy them, they didn't really think hard about whether they wanted them, since they might have automatically assumed that if they had, it might have been too late, because others might have got them. So the stores can achieve a great success by their advertising techniques.

So when in a shop that has a lot of things on sale, it's worth thinking about whether an item will really come in handy, and whether if so, similar things might not be found that are just as cheap and just as good, with not that much more time and effort.

Creating Competition to Buy Between Customers

Apparently even top executives, whom one might assume should know better, fall for the urge to buy things that are bad deals when there's competition, so they don't have time to think clearly about what they're doing, because they want to get something before others do in case they lose out. In the early 1970s, for example, a television boss agreed to pay well over three million dollars for a single showing of the movie The Poseidon Adventure. That was a much bigger price than anything that had been paid for the television showing of a film before, the next most expensive being bought for a bad enough price, but only 2 million dollars. After he'd bought it, the boss regretted having been willing to pay so much for it. Being an experienced and respected businessman, he might have been expected to know better. The reason he made what seemed a crazy decision might have had a lot to do with the fact that it was the first ever time that a motion picture had been offered to the television networks in an open-bid auction - the bosses were competing for the right to show the film, with very little time to think about their decisions before they made them, and pressure to outdo the others to get it, since it was seen as something that would draw in lots of viewers. And since they didn't have past experiences of mistakes made in such contests to go on, they didn't have cautionary thoughts going around in their heads about the need to be careful and only pay an amount that the film was really likely to be worth. After the auction, the film executive who'd won the rights to show the film seemed regretful, when he said his network had decided never again to enter into an auction situation. One of his rivals in the auction was clearly glad to have lost, although he had felt eager to win at the time. He said that before the auction started, he and his colleagues thought about it sensibly, and calculated how much the film was likely to be worth. But when the bidding got going, the adrenaline kicked in, and for a while, he just wanted to outbid the others so he'd get the rights to show the movie, with all the extra viewers it was likely to pull in, rather than them. He said it was as if he lost his mind when the competitive fervour kicked in. But then he came back to his senses again in time not to make a mistake he might have seriously regretted. He said he put a bid in for 3.2 million dollars. Then the thought came to him that that was such a massive amount that he didn't have a clue how he could possibly make it be worth the money if he got it. when another network put in a higher bid, he was relieved he hadn't got it. He said the experience of having nearly made such a huge error of judgment was "very educational".

An auction was done year after year with ordinary students, where the tutor would say he was auctioning off a $20 bill. But the auction had a special rule: The second highest bidder would lose all the money they bid. At first, students were eager at the prospect of getting $20 for virtually nothing, and put up their hands to bid. When the bidding reached about $16, most realised where it was heading - that if they weren't careful, they'd be paying more for the bill than it was worth - and they stopped bidding. But a few didn't.

When the bidding got near the $20 mark, the second highest bidder realised that if he stopped bidding, he'd lose nearly $20; so to avoid that, he'd bid $21. The other students would generally laugh at the prospect of someone paying over $20 for a $20 bill. But at that stage, the one who bid the most would still only lose around a dollar, so it would seem worth trying to bid the most, since stopping would mean losing a lot more. But those still in the auction so disliked the prospect of losing money that they bid on and on. After the $20 mark, there would generally be only two bidders left in the auction; but since neither wanted to end up paying money for nothing, they'd go on bidding more and more, even when that meant they would actually be paying twice the amount for the $20 bill than it was worth if they got it.

The highest ever bid was $204. Clearly a person buying a $20 bill for that would have lost $184 dollars even after he received the $20 bill. So there came a point in the auction when each person was going to have to pay a lot of money whether they won or lost the bidding. But they carried on bidding higher and higher amounts, even when it meant they'd have to pay more and more whether they won or lost. in their anxiety not to lose money, and under the sway of the competitive emotion, both would keep on bidding way past the time when it would have been sensible to stop. It seems they lost sight of that fact under the pressure of wanting to be the one who won, and not wanting to have to pay a lot of money for nothing.

It seems that under the pressure of trying to not be the one who lost money without gaining anything, they didn't stop to think that once the bidding got beyond $40, they'd be losing more money than they were given even if they won the auction, and the more they bid, the more they'd lose, even if they won the $20 bill.

When people become intent on a course of action, they can become so focused on it that they forget to think of things from other points of view. The only thought in their minds is getting what they want, or avoiding something they don't want; and their minds are too focused on achieving what they want to think of anything but sticking to what they've been doing all along to try to get it. That's especially true if they're reacting to something all the time, like the other person's auction bids, coming so fast they don't leave them time to stop and think.

It's hoped that people can learn from the mistakes of others though, so as not to make similar ones themselves. If those bidding at the film auction had stopped to think that there were lots of other movies around that could draw in big ratings if they were advertised well, they might not have blown, or risked blowing, so much money on just one. Likewise with ordinary people and other things: When people feel as if they're under pressure to make quick decisions or they'll be outdone by others and might miss out, they can make decisions that could have even serious long-term consequences, without regard for the possible defects of a thing, or whether it's worth the money.

When people feel a sense of urgency, and the competitive instinct and adrenaline kick in, people get too carried away to stop and think. The salesmen might create the conditions for competition, but then it's the customers' own feelings that carry them away into making decisions that might be bad and regretted.

People can recognise the warning signs that the competitive instinct is clouding their thinking if they know what to watch out for though: When the heart starts pumping faster, and, more noticeably, a sense of excitement and adrenaline kicks in, with a desire to outdo someone else who wants the same thing, that'll be a sign that logical sensible thought is becoming harder and harder, so the chances of making a mistake are increasing. So the thing to do when that happens is to take several seconds to try to calm down before making any decision at all, or to realise that the symptoms are pretty likely to mean feelings are deliberately being manipulated by clever tactics, because someone wants to sell more things.

Getting People Who Seem Like Ordinary Members of the Public to Publicly Praise a Product

Not only do advertisers manage to increase their sales by having famous people endorse the products they're advertising, but they sometimes make adverts where someone who's supposedly just an ordinary person chats away in an ordinary way about how good something is, the idea being that if people realise that someone they identify with likes the product, they might think it could be good for them too. Sometimes the people praising it are just actors paid by the company selling it, pretending to be ordinary members of the public who are just praising it because they like it. But they won't always be. But even if they do genuinely love the product, they won't necessarily represent the majority of those who've already bought it. And even if they do, that doesn't mean there aren't much better similar products around for a similar price.

It Would be Unfair to Think of All Salesmen as Dishonest

Having talked about the tactics many salesmen use to get customers to buy, it's important to say that not all salesmen are out to trick people; some will try to be honest, and will genuinely try to get a good deal for the customer; and salesmen can be under pressure to sell from the management, and in competition with other salesmen to get customers; if they don't get successful sales, it can sometimes mean an uncomfortably poor pay packet that month, because they're often paid a basic salary plus commission on anything they sell. And a salesman's job can be stressful because of customers who themselves can be awkward and unpleasant, and sometimes out to try to con the salesman, for instance if they want to trade in their old car for a flashy new one, and try to conceal the fact that their old one's been in an accident, because they want to get a much better price for it than they'd get if the salesman knew that. That tactic often doesn't work though, because there are records of cars' history the salesman can access.

Part Two
Tricks Supermarkets Use to Entice People to Buy More

Supermarkets are fantastic places, making people's lives much easier than they might be if they didn't exist, and providing a whole variety of foods that just might not be easily available if they didn't, increasing everybody's quality of life.

But they're in competition with each other to attract customers; and also they naturally want to make as much profit as they can without risking driving customers away. Some of the tactics they resort to in the effort can mislead customers into thinking they're getting better bargains than they are. But customers can save money if they get wise to the tricks supermarkets use:

Hundreds of Price Cuts?

It can sound impressive when a supermarket or other shop advertises that they've made hundreds of price cuts. But they won't necessarily be big ones.

A couple of supermarkets apparently advertised in the week leading up to one Christmas that they'd made masses of price cuts. One boasted that it had "slashed" prices; the prices of 930 products had gone down! It didn't mention that it had actually reduced 70 % of those things in price by one penny, while increasing the prices of around a thousand other products at the same time, the majority by more than ten pence.

It isn't just at Christmas that that kind of thing can happen; at other times, they can reduce hundreds of products in price by a penny too, and then advertise price cuts. It might be thought that it wouldn't be worth it, with all the hassle and expense they have to go through altering the price information. But they obviously think the power it gives them to entice customers in makes it worth it.

Special Offer Rip-Offs

Special offers aren't always the bargains they seem. Often, supermarkets put the price of a product up for a very short time, and then bring it down again, and advertise with a big sign that they've cut the price, perhaps by as much as half! So people think they're getting a great bargain, when actually, they're just getting the product at the usual price.

You can be fairly sure something like that's happened if the price it was at before the price was cut was so high you can't imagine many people buying it at that price.

There's a law in the UK that supermarkets have to sell something at the higher price for four weeks before they can lower it and claim they're selling it at a special offer. But that doesn't apply to fruit and vegetables, because they're going up and down in price all the time, because their availability varies so much during the year, so they're sometimes more expensive to get hold of than at other times. But supermarkets can take advantage of that. A consumer organisation found that one supermarket had sold cherries for 'half price' for two months, when they'd only been the supposed full price for 17 days. Another supermarket advertised blueberries at 'half price' for six weeks, when they'd only been their supposed full price for two.

The law does say that most goods aren't supposed to be on offer for longer than they were at the artificially-inflated price for, which is apparently why offers are often only available for four weeks, the minimum amount of time most goods can legally be at a higher price for before a supermarket can claim that lowering the price is a 'special offer'.

All this is not to say there aren't genuine bargains to be had at supermarkets. There are. There are some great ones sometimes. It's just that some things that look like bargains at a glance aren't really.

Special Offers Aren't Necessarily Cheaper Than Similar Products

When a supermarket offers two products for the price of one, or three for the price of two and so on, it seems like a good deal. But it might actually be more expensive than the same number of very similar products of a different brand.

Also, it's only worth taking advantage of offers if the products are things you actually need, and preferably were going to buy anyway. Otherwise, you can imagine you're making some great savings, while walking out of the supermarket having actually spent a whole lot more money than you would have done if you hadn't been tempted by the offer of savings!

If a product was a pound, and the price was cut to 50 pence, it's possible that the offer could be sold a bit like this:

Buy one of these and you save 50p! Buy two and you save a pound! Buy three and you save £1.50.

But of course, if you didn't want the product before you went into the store, and wouldn't have bought it if it wasn't on offer, you're not really saving money; if you buy three of the items, you're spending £1.50 that you wouldn't have spent if you didn't buy those things.

Also, supermarkets often advertise offers that say you can get a product at a reduced price if you buy two of them, for instance two for £2.. But it's worth looking at the price of one product before buying two if you don't really need that many, because some of the price reductions are pretty small. For instance, an offer of two for £2 might look good, but one product on its own might only be a few pence above a pound! So really, to buy two, unless you'd have bought two sooner or later anyway, or really want them, is paying more money; it's hardly saving.

But again, offers can be useful if they're on products you usually buy or need. It is best to check the price against other similar products though.

And not just similar products. Sometimes buying larger packs, or two smaller packs of the same product, is cheaper than buying the exact product on offer, especially when buying the supermarket's own brand, rather than the one on offer.

And if, realistically, you'll only really want to use a smaller amount in the foreseeable future, then it can be cheaper to buy the smaller amount than a larger amount that's on offer.

Some good bargains can be found by people going to a supermarket at the end of the day. There will be fruit and vegetables that are just about to reach their 'best before' date, that would be thrown away at the end of the day if not eaten, yet most will still be perfectly good to eat for a little while. But because they're so near their 'best before' date, they'll be reduced in price. So the end of the day is a good time to get the cheapest fruit and vegetables, and sometimes other things as well.

Buying Bigger Packs Isn't Necessarily Cheaper in the Long-Term

It's often assumed that buying bigger things will work out cheaper in the end. But things don't always work that way. People can end up spending nearly 50 % more than they would if they bought the same amount made up of several little things instead. So it's just as well to check the prices. To give a few examples, a survey was done for a price comparison website, and one thing they found was that buying one big jar of mayonnaise cost almost a pound more than buying two jars half the size. They also found that a big pack of razors was almost £15, but two half-sized packs would cost only about ten pounds!

One problem is that since prices fluctuate from week to week, there's no guarantee that something half the price of something else will be by next week; the prices could have reversed even. So checking the price of everything to save the most money possible would have to be done every time, and would get very time-consuming. So it would be impractical for most people to scrupulously evade all the ploys supermarkets use; it's no wonder people spend more money than they need to. Some tricks can be spotted though, so money can be saved.

Making Popular Items Cheaper to Give the Impression it's a Cheap Store, While Raising the Prices of Others to Compensate

People can assume that if everyday items like bread, milk, baked beans and bananas are cheap in a particular supermarket, all the groceries they buy from there will be quite cheap. But that's not necessarily the case; in fact, supermarkets can price popular items cheaply, even so cheaply they hardly make a profit, to attract customers; but they can raise the price of other items to recoup the losses.

Putting the Most Expensive Things on the Shelves at Eye Level

People often find things that give them better value for money if they look at what's on the bottom shelf, and sometimes also on the top one. Supermarkets tend to tactically put the most expensive things and the things 'on offer' where people are most likely to see them, at their eye level, or at the eye level of little children in trolleys who might reach out and grab top-of-the-range products, so people are most likely to buy those. They can also put cheaper versions in bland packaging, so they're less noticeable. Looking on the bottom shelf might bring some pleasant surprises as regards the price, as compared to that of products in your eye line.

Shopping can also work out cheaper if children are left at home under the supervision of other family members. It means they won't become attached to the top-priced products, and also that they won't be a distraction from the search for the cheapest products.

A similar thing supermarkets do is to pair up products people often like to have together, to entice customers to buy both when they might not have done otherwise. For instance, they might put biscuits next to teabags, in the hope that some people buying teabags will see the biscuits, and their senses might entice them to think it would be nice to have biscuits with their tea, so they'll buy some.

Anyone who's aware of this kind of strategy and has a budget to stick to can watch out for this kind of thing, and try to make a point of not giving into temptation.

Putting Some of the Most Enticing Food Near the Checkout

Supermarkets will tend to put food that a lot of people find yummiest like chocolate at the checkout, where everyone will see it. It's easy to buy some because it takes your fancy on the spur of the moment. But these things are often quite expensive. If a customer comes into the supermarket planning to spend no more than a certain amount, their resolve might be tested quite a bit by what they see; and since the yummiest things will be put where they're most likely to see them, it might be easy to give into temptation. One way of reducing temptation is to go shopping just after a meal, when you're feeling full, so food won't be quite so enticing.

Positioning Things So People Have to Walk Past the Most Enticing Things on Their Way to the Important Things

Apparently, a lot of supermarkets lay their store out in a similar way, with foods that are supposed to make up part of most people's diet, or that most people will want, like fruit and vegetables, meat and dairy products, around the outside, and things like processed, frozen and pre-packaged food in the middle. They apparently do that deliberately, so people will have to walk past the fancier things to get to what they need, and are likely to buy some of them on the way. Things that most people think of as an important part of their diet, like Bread and milk, tend to be near the back of the shop, so people have to walk past a lot of other things to get to them, and will likely buy more than they would if they got to what they needed immediately.

Anyone who needs to be conscious of the amount of money they spend, or health-conscious, might do best to stick to walking around the outside of such a store, or if they have to go into the middle, following the signs to get straight to what they want, to reduce temptation.

Deceptive Pricing

Supermarkets have to give the price per weight or volume of each product, but they don't have to give the same measurement for each product; so, for instance, they might mark one brand of orange juice as 50 pence per litre, and then mark another as 8 p per 100 millilitres. People might look at the price of 8 p, and instantly think it looks like a great bargain in contrast to the 50 p, not realising that a litre is 1000 ml, so a litre of the orange juice priced 8p per 100ml would be ten times the price given for 100 ml, 80p, which is actually a fair bit more expensive than the one priced at 50p per litre would be. So it's best to check that kind of thing, and not be fooled by a price that looks cheap at a glance.

To give another example, a supermarket might have a big colourful banner advertising that something is half price, or that there's £1 off the price of it or something, and it might well draw customers in; but it might be the price per kilo, rather than the price per pack, and if it's something lightweight like spinach or something, the packs might be far lighter than a kilo, and it would take several to make up the kilo; and obviously buying a pack that was five times lighter than a kilo would only qualify for a price reduction that was a fifth of the amount that a person would get if they bought an entire kilo's worth, for instance, so it might well turn out to be pretty insignificant.

Attracting People With Pretty Packaging

Supermarkets tend to put their cheap own brand products in packaging that looks boring, partly so it'll seem less appealing than expensive things, that tend to be in attractive packaging, so they'll be more noticeable and seem more appealing. Often the cheaper equivalents are just as nice as those labelled "Finest" or something like that, as well as being better value for money. If you think something looks delicious on a supermarket shelf, think about whether it might in reality be the packaging that looks nice. You won't want to eat that! What's inside a boring-looking packet might be just as good as what's in a nicer-looking one.

Incidentally, a similar issue is that buying vegetables loose is cheaper than buying them pre-packed. That's because the supermarket has to pay for the packaging and the costs of people at the factory packing them, so that puts the price up.

Paying attention to all these things might mean shopping takes more time, but it could well save money on every shopping trip.

Part Three
How People Can Short-change Themselves By Their Own Spending Habits

I read a book by someone called Alvin Hall, who did several series on television where he tried to help people overcome their money problems. It was interesting that the reasons they were always short of money often had a lot to do with their attitudes and habits, rather than because they just weren't earning much, or that try as they might, they couldn't get work.

He says there are several attitudes to money that are actually self-defeating, because people think they're using it in their best interests, when really they're not. He goes into some detail:

The Temptation to Buy Lots of Things on Impulse

He says one self-defeating attitude is having such a sense of entitlement to things that a lot of impulse buys are made, with the justification that they're deserved. They might be enjoyed at the time, but there might be other, less expensive ways of feeling gratified; if people put their minds to thinking of some, they might well end up better off, especially because they won't be so likely to end up with the misery of not being able to afford things they really and truly want one day because they've built up debts, partly because of all their impulse-buys.

Spending a Lot of Money on Taking Big Risks

Another self-defeating attitude the author mentions is one where it's thought of as a good idea to spend money on a big dream, without calculating the possible costs, for instance starting a business, and then spending a lot of the profits it makes on the high life, not taking into account the possibility that the company could become less successful if the economy goes into recession for a while and people can't afford to buy so much, or that it might run into trouble because some customers are slow in paying, so it's worth saving money to put into the business to keep it going in hard times, or to spend on taking it in new and imaginative directions over time to appeal to more people.

People who embark on big projects like that without thinking through the possible costs first can also end up in a lot of debt, being a burden to others they borrow a lot of money from, and ending up miserable, because they have to spend a long time doing their best to get out of debt, rather than enjoying what their money could still buy if they'd kept more of it.

The author says some people are led by their feelings to spend more money than they have, and that it seems that the only thing on their minds is what they'd like, rather than whether they can afford it. But some go to more extremes than others.

One couple spent a huge amount on their wedding, wanting a blissful experience on a tropical island. They really enjoyed themselves. But they had to go into debt to afford it; and well over a year later, they were still squabbling over how to pay the bills. It ruined their marriage. It also meant they couldn't afford a mortgage, and had to stay in a flat that was too small for them. When they had a baby a year after the wedding, living conditions became even more cramped!

Young and middle-aged people have no way of knowing whether they'll live to a ripe old age or not; but the odds of them still being around in five years' time will normally be quite good; so it's worth planning for the longer term before making big decisions or spending a lot on little things. After all, cheaper alternatives to a lot of things can often be found that are just as good; and then money will be left over to spend on more stuff later.

Another kind of attitude that's self-defeating in the end is one that thinks risks are worth it for the adrenaline rush that comes on when people take them. Some people just love taking risks for the sake of it, since it gives them an adrenaline buzz that's addictive. So they might gamble, or spend a lot of money on starting a business that has a high chance of failing, or do other things that aren't wise but feel good at the time, which is what they think counts. They may just be able to laugh or shrug off their debts for a while, not really thinking about them as problems. But chances are that won't always be the way it is. The future may have some nasty surprises.

Again, risk-takers often won't feel good if they end up having to make sacrifices; or they might lose friends and even spouses, because they're in debt, and borrowing money from them that they can't pay back, which might even end up with those other people getting into debt if they're too generous.

So anyone who craves an adrenaline buzz would probably be better off looking into other - comparatively harmless but equally pleasurable - ways of getting it.

Shopping Addiction

Addiction to shopping is another self-defeating behaviour, since people can buy a whole load of stuff with money they could have spent on things they really wanted, and end up in debt, not being able to buy things they value much more than a lot of what they spent their money on, and again, perhaps losing spouses and children even, if their spouses feel too insecure living with them and trying to cope with their irresponsibility with money.

People can get addicted to things if an emotional need in their lives isn't being met, so they're subconsciously looking for something to substitute for it; so it might well be worth people who are addicted to things trying to work out what they'd really ideally like more or less of in their lives, and trying to work towards getting it, so they can find real fulfilment in life, rather than trying to get some kind of satisfaction from a lot of things they don't need, when they could be saving their money till they can put it to something truly rewarding.

Advice on Ways of Changing Unwise Spending Habits

One thing that could help some people is if when they get an impulse to buy something, they stop first, and ask themselves questions, like:

• Will I appreciate this just as much when I've got it home?
• What about in a week or two, or a month? (If it's clothing), will I still want to wear it often? Is it possible I won't, so I'll have wasted the money I want to spend on it?
• Could I find a cheaper deal?
• Could I find something similar but better if I shopped around?
• Would I feel more emotionally fulfilled if I gave the money to some good cause instead of blowing it on something I don't really need?

The author of the book about money advises people to look over their old bank and credit card statements, to remind themselves of what they've bought, and to ask themselves how long they enjoyed each thing they bought for, and whether it was worth it, or whether a lot of things they bought were things they only took pleasure in for a little while, and then perhaps even forgot about, so really and truly, they might not have been worth buying. That's especially if spending so much money had unfortunate consequences, like a build-up of debt, or weight gain - supposing a lot of money was spent on edible treats.

Sometimes, guilt at having spent the money can outweigh the pleasure that was gained from it at the time. So thinking about past purchases can give people ideas about what's worth changing about the way they spend their money, and give them motivation to do so.

Thinking about future purchases can help too. When thinking about buying something on impulse, it can be worth calculating what percentage of your daily, weekly or monthly earnings you'll be spending; if you realise it's, say, equivalent to an entire day's salary, or even an hour's salary, it'll be worth thinking about whether you'll really get the joy or use out of it that would make it worth that much.

Or if you're buying it for someone else, it'll be worth making an educated guess about how long they might use it for, and how much pleasure they'll get from it, and then deciding whether the equivalent number of hours' salary that's used to pay for it will be a good bargain, or whether something else would be money better spent.

For instance, buying children a lot of expensive toys can please them at first, but a lot of them might soon be forgotten; and what they enjoy playing with best might even be the cardboard boxes some of them came in, with them perhaps pretending they're houses or rabbit hutches or something.

Another thing worth doing is making a rough estimate of the amount of money you'll need in the coming month to pay for things you'll actually need, or that will make your standard of living what you'd consider decent, and then calculating how much money you'll earn or be given that's surplus to that. Some money will be worth saving in case an unforeseen need comes up, or to make it easier to satisfy some future dream or need or aspiration. After all that's been factored in, the rest will be roughly the amount of money you can spend on what you want without going into debt. If the surplus amount is a lot less than the amount you normally spend, so you're in debt already, perhaps you need to think of some cheaper ways of having fun and so on. There are likely some out there.

Being Motivated to Spend Money Out of Anger

Another type of self-defeating attitude that makes people want to spend a lot of money they can regret having spent later is defiance and anger; some people think they may as well spend a lot of money on just what they want now, since after all, they might die tomorrow. They can develop that attitude after the early death of a loved one, or just because they see other people around them with lots of money they didn't work that hard to earn, and they can feel hard-done-by, justifiably or not. They can fritter away massive amounts of money in a very short time sometimes, because they think it'll be so unfair if they have to miss out on enjoying themselves by not spending it.

But if they live to a ripe old age, instead of dying young, then long before they do, they can start feeling even angrier at the system, rather than happier, because they find they haven't got much money to spend on things they discover they really and truly want and need, after having spent so much of it living for the moment, on nights out and things. Instead of regretting having done it though, they can think they've got the right to expect the system to pay for their upkeep, feeling resentful that they're not getting more money than they are from it, and feeling entitled to the help, because they feel owed a living by an unfair system. They can realise too late that they could have done a lot to help themselves by saving more money, and that what the government offers isn't as generous as they were expecting, so they have to go without things they want, and it's essentially their own fault.

So basically, although they think they're doing themselves a favour by spending money so quickly, they're actually hurting themselves, doing themselves out of financial security, and maybe the chance of buying some really worthwhile things in the future.

Sometimes they might be trying to get revenge on a particular person like a parent, by asking them for money and then frittering it away and begging for more, and then doing the same thing over and over again. They'd be happier if they tried to analyse and come to terms with what's making them so angry, so they can perhaps reconcile themselves to people or things, and move on with their lives, planning positive things that'll benefit themselves and others in the future.

Feeling Compelled to Get People Out of Financial Trouble

Some people fritter away their money, but realise they might be in trouble if they carry on, and are always looking for someone to solve their money problems for them, often by giving them more money. They're like parasites, living off others. But the people they live off can have equally unhealthy attitudes to money; they give in to the person's requests for money again and again, even though doing that is likely to mean the person never learns that it's a bad thing to be irresponsible with money. The motives of the person who keeps bailing them out of trouble by giving them more money can be a sense of pride and the self-esteem boost they get from being seen as the responsible one with the power to save the situation, and the feeling of self-worth and significance and purpose in life they get from being needed. But it can come to be more stressful as their finances get drained, and in the end, they might not even feel valued for what they do, but taken for granted.

If anyone feels that they're drawn to fixing other people's financial problems, even when they've got into them through irresponsibility, they could ask themselves whether they could find emotional fulfilment in healthier ways, and whether it could really be the case that they don't deserve to value themselves as they are, rather than feeling as if they have to keep sorting someone else's problems out to feel worthwhile.

Being Reluctant to Spend Money

Sometimes, people can have the opposite problem: Another unhealthy attitude to money that can become addictive is hoarding. It seems that some people don't feel financially secure no matter how much money they have, and they take so much pleasure in seeing their bank balance accumulate that they resent or feel unsettled about spending any money they don't absolutely have to, even if it would increase their quality of life. So really, they're doing themselves out of happiness. It would be a shame if they were to die without having used some of their money to give themselves and other people pleasure.

Feeling Too Anxious About Managing Money to Try to Solve Financial Problems or Check Savings

Another unhealthy attitude to money is feeling as if it's too complicated to manage; some people get into debt because they feel anxious when they think of money, so they don't calculate how they can make what they have go around without over-spending; and when they think they have over-spent, they feel too anxious to deal with it, so they ignore demands for payment till they're in trouble, such as if they get their phone cut off for not paying the bill for a long time.

There are trained people who can help people manage their money till they're out of debt. Then, the calculations needed for a person to stay living within their means can be quite easy to make.

Someone who's got themselves into debt and feels anxious at the very thought of trying to tackle it might feel better if they take a systematic approach; instead of thinking of the whole thing as one huge problem, - though it won't be a pleasant thing to do, - they could take all their unpaid bills and put them on the table, and sort them in order of urgency or seriousness, putting the one that's the biggest problem at the top, and then putting them in order from most important to least important. Then they can start making plans about how to repay the money, and aim to put one plan into operation per day:

For instance, one day they could phone their credit card company, explain their difficulties, and ask to be able to pay in instalments over a certain length of time. The credit card company will help people arrange plans that make payment easier over time like that.

Another day, they could give up something that's a serious drain on their finances, like smoking or gambling, looking into the support available to help them if they need it.

On yet another day, they could speak to their boss if they're working, about whether they could do some overtime.

And so on. Problems stop seeming so intimidating after plans have been made to tackle them.

Planning to solve just one problem a day will mean that even if the solution's discouraging, at least there won't have to be more than one a day. But when it becomes easier to make changes, perhaps more than one problem can be solved per day, so they get solved more quickly.

It can be best to go about solving each one in the morning, since resolve to solve it can drain away the more it's put off.

Every time you solve a problem, you could do something symbolic to celebrate. One way might be to write down the action you're going to take to solve the problem that day on a card or something in the morning, and then cross it out in a cheerful colour after the action's been taken. You could congratulate yourself, and leave the cards somewhere to pile up, so you can tell how many things you've achieved in your attempts to get rid of the problem.

Some people are scared that once they start to tackle their money problems, true dedication to getting out of debt and living sensibly from then on will mean never treating themselves again. But though it will mean a change of lifestyle, a treat, every so often, within limits, won't make a significant difference to their savings.

Attitudes to Money can Sometimes Stem From the Habits of Parents

Some people don't realise it, but the reason they have the attitudes they have is because they've learned them from their parents, or they've been reacting against an attitude their parents held, such as being too frugal with money and often denying them treats they longed for, which made them feel as if they never wanted to deny themselves anything again. When they realise that's the main reason they spend the way they do, they can realise they don't spend for any reason that's really important, and that can stop them having the urge. And realising why you're the way you are can sometimes bring the realisation that bad habits you thought had a hold over you for reasons you couldn't understand aren't there for a good reason after all; so they're easier to break.

Over-Spending Out of Envy, or Worry About What People Will Think Otherwise

Some people over-spend for reasons they think of as important, but they over-estimate their importance. For instance, they might be envious of people who can go on expensive holidays, and want the same. But there are ways of enjoying yourself that barely cost a thing; and isn't the enjoyment you get out of something what really counts?

Or some people are afraid of what people will think of them if they have to admit they can't afford the high life. But what hard evidence is there that they'll think anything bad? If you suggest cheap and cheerful alternative things to do, then maybe they'll like your ideas and decide to try them; and then maybe they'll even be thankful that they don't have to burden their own bank balances any more with forking out on what they themselves feel expected to fork out on. Cheaper doesn't necessarily mean less enjoyable; and other people might find someone who dares to be different and finds imaginative cheaper ways of having fun to be a source of inspiration, especially if their own finances are being burdened by their expensive lifestyles, which might secretly be a source of anxiety to them, for all anyone knows.

Anyone thinking of spending a lot of money on something would do well to ask themselves questions first, like,

Can I really afford this? How will I feel about this in five years' time? Will I be grateful I spent the money? Will I even be able to remember much about what I bought? Will I value it? Or might I be in debt, regretting having spent the money?

Part Four
Managing Money More Successfully

If you know you've been handling money badly, whatever the reason is, there are questions you could ask yourself to help yourself think up your own solutions that work for you:

Just day-dream for a while, and imagine that one night, something incredible happens in your mind while you're asleep, and when you wake up, you don't know it's happened, but you're suddenly really responsible with money, using it from then on to buy pleasures when you can afford them, and things you need, but not over-spending.

How will you get to realise the amazing thing's happened that's made you so responsible with money all of a sudden?

• What will you notice you're doing differently in the next few days?
• What will the people close to you notice that's different, that they could compliment you on?
• At the times of day when you'd normally be tempted to spend money unwisely, or not spend it when you really should, what will you be doing differently? How will you be handling the temptation so you don't give into it?
• If you've got children, what will you be doing differently that you can look back on with satisfaction later in life, knowing you set them a good example to imitate? How might they behave in future because of the good example you set them?

Then ask yourself if part of the amazing thing is already happening in your life - whether there are already parts of your life where you're making some of those differences.

You could ask yourself how much of the incredible thing, on a scale of one to ten, is already happening. Then you could ask yourself what you'd have to do to improve it even just a little bit. For instance, if you feel you're still mismanaging money a lot, so you'd have to say your situation is at a two, you could ask yourself what you would have to do to move it up to a three.

If you think things are so dire you'd have to say you were at zero, you can still ask yourself what you've been doing that's prevented them from slipping down into minus figures.

Then you could ask yourself how motivated you are to move up the scale, again on a scale of one to ten. If you'd really rather not tackle the money mismanagement problem, so you put yourself at a one, you could ask yourself what would have to happen in your life to change your attitude even just a bit, so you could move up even just one point on the scale. And then you could ask yourself how you could gradually move up the scale more and more over time, and what you could do to help make it happen.

You can also ask yourself about times in the past when you were handling money better than you are now: What were you doing that was different? What helped you to cope better than usual? What could you learn from those times to help you in future?

It's best not to try to change too much in one go, in case you don't achieve as much as you were hoping for, and give up the whole idea in disappointment. It's best to plan careful steps towards better money management, rather than optimistically hoping things will be totally transformed in one go.

Some people are habitual risk-takers, who love the adrenaline buzz they get from it; a lot turn to gambling, and end up with huge debts. Anyone who's done that could ask themselves questions to help them think up solutions, such as:

• What was happening at the times in my life when I wasn't gambling? How did I manage to stop myself for a while? What in my life was satisfying me enough that I didn't have the urge to gamble? Or if I did have the temptation, how did I stop myself?
• If I feel I must have that adrenaline buzz, what alternative but harmless ways could I get such a thing in, so I don't feel the need to gamble to get it? Perhaps a more exciting job? Or taking up a sport where I'd be in healthy competition with others? Maybe something else?
• Or what would have to be happening in my life that I wouldn't feel the need for the adrenaline buzz? How could I help make it happen?
• When has it happened in the past? What was I doing then that I could learn from?

Part Five
Money-Saving Tips From a Former Television Programme Presenter

There was once a series of programmes on BBC2 called Your Money or Your Life, where the presenter, Alvin Hall, would advise families who were in a bit of financial difficulty on ways they could save money. It turned out that they were tending to spend money on things unwisely, not realising how much their decisions cost over time; and surprisingly, just making a few adjustments helped their financial situations become healthier.

Naturally, not everyone's financial problems could be resolved with a mere few adjustments to spending; but there may be a fair number of people who would benefit a lot from money-saving advice.

Alvin Hall has written books that give advice on saving money; and he has also put advice online. Here are some of his suggestions:

Saving Money While Food Shopping

One thing he advises is that it would be a good thing to cut down on impulse-buying. Much as it can seem that a person's quality of life will improve soon if they go for something tempting when they're out shopping, or shopping online, that they hadn't intended to buy, especially if it's food, the gratification provided by eating it, or using it in some other way - such as if it's a piece of fashionable clothing - may only be momentary - or at least short-lived; and sadly, it would be best if it were to be weighed against the anxiety that the financial difficulties will cause in the longer term.

It may be that a lot of people's financial situation will improve over time, so the time will come when indulging in such things won't lead to anxiety over money worries any more; but for a while, it will. So although it might feel irksome in the moment, deferring the gratification might often be best.

Alvin Hall recommends that the temptation to buy things on impulse that will lead to momentary pleasure, but that will increase anxiety over financial worries in the longer term, can be avoided, if rather than using credit cards when they go shopping, people take a fixed amount of cash out with them, and only spend that amount. If they find they've gone over that amount, they put one or more items in their shopping trolley back.

It might mean making some brainache-making calculations while going around the store; and it's best to try making a shopping list before going out, and to only buy the items on it, rather than going around the store, deciding what to buy on the spur of the moment.

It can help to plan meals in advance, calculating their likely cost, and to only shop for food once or twice a week, to reduce the temptation of impulse-buying.

It's best not to go without some higher-priced items altogether though, since some can provide important nutrition. So if possible, it can be healthier to buy some sometimes, while looking out for cheaper items when it comes to most of the essentials.

Trying different supermarkets and comparing their prices can also help, especially because some might have regular special offers on items that are often wanted.

When it comes to buying some non-perishable items, it can sometimes be best to wait for a while, in the hope that they can be bought when they're on a special offer.

There are some things, such as bottles of wine, where some are much cheaper than others, and yet have the same number of units of alcohol. So it's worth looking for the items that seem to be the best value, rather than going for something that instantly looks attractive, but is a bit expensive.

Sometimes, things bought from market stalls can be a fair bit cheaper than they are in supermarkets, so it's worth browsing around them.

Sometimes, there are discount vouchers online or in magazines or newspapers that can help.

Prepared and takeaway foods can increase the cost of food a lot; so it can be better to buy more basic foods, and then think of ways to make meals from scratch, while saving a fair bit of the time that using the prepared meals would have saved by making bigger meals than people are likely to eat in one go, and keeping leftovers in the fridge or the freezer, so they can be quickly prepared another time, possibly in combination with other foods to make them more interesting.

It's cheaper, easier to plan, and easier to calculate the costs of things, and less time-consuming, if the whole family can eat the same healthy meal at the table at the same time, rather than parents trying to cater for their individual wants, with them each eating when they most feel like it.

Saving Money When Buying for Babies and Children

Alvin Hall recommends a range of things:

Naturally, it's good to take advantage of special offers; and if you notice there are items on offer regularly, and it's convenient to wait to buy certain items in hopes of them being on offer again soon, it can be best to do that.

And before impulse-buys are made, it's best to make calculations about whether they can really be afforded.

Considering that babies grow fast, they can quickly outgrow clothes that are bought for them; so it's best not to buy that many non-essential clothes, or especially nice clothes for special occasions.

Often, things are cheaper when they're bought in bulk; so if it's affordable, buying bigger amounts of an item that will often be used can be cheaper than buying small amounts of them regularly.

On special occasions like Christmas or a baby's birthday, it can help to ask relatives to all contribute to buying an expensive item you're going to need and would find hard to afford, such as a baby buggy, or a piece of electronic equipment for an older child, rather than each of them buying little things.

Good-quality second-hand toys can be worth buying, rather than new ones all the time; children can get just as much fun playing with them.

Likewise, clothes don't all have to be new; some relatives might have clothes their children hardly wore before they grew out of them, that they'd be happy to hand on to you.

Just because something's expensive, it doesn't necessarily mean it's of a better quality than a similar cheaper item. So when buying online, it's best to look at pros and cons and prices of different items, rather than immediately going for something that looks attractive, or dismissing cheaper items out of hand.

On a child's birthday, it's best if people don't feel pressured or tempted to put on a really expensive party that's designed to impress people or to compete with other parents' ideas. The most important thing is doing something the child's guaranteed to enjoy, which won't necessarily be expensive or elaborate.

If a child would like several expensive birthday or Christmas presents, it can be best to make them choose just one out of the list of what they want that they'd like most, explaining to them that money's limited, and maybe how much money some of the items cost as a rough percentage of the amount of income the family's got coming in each week, or day.

If they get pocket money, or gifts of money from relatives, it can get them into good habits if they're taught to always save a percentage of it. They can be told that when they've saved up enough, they'll be able to afford expensive items themselves. That'll reduce the pressure to buy expensive things for them, among other things.

Family Days Out and Holidays

One thing Alvin Hall recommends is making more use of the local library; there might be books in there that keep children occupied and entertained for hours, at no cost at all. Also, it might be possible to do things such as hire out DVDs in there for family entertainment in the home.

Nature walks can be worthwhile entertainment too for some, as well as being healthy; they can be opportunities for playing, learning more about the trees and flowers on the walks, and observing the differences between them, and doing such things as picking wild blackberries sometimes. Maybe the children can sometimes be tested for fun on their knowledge of such things as what differences there are between various flowers, bushes and trees, with a little prize going to the one who remembers most of what they've been told by the parents before.

It can be good to find out regularly if any museums and other such places that it'll be easy to get to are doing exhibitions that will interest children, especially since museums are often free to get into. Some related amusing or interesting historical facts could be collected from the Internet, and taken along to help keep the children interested.

Besides that, there are often low-cost or free events going on in the locality at weekends or during holidays that are advertised online, some of which might be of interest to children. They can also be advertised in local newspapers, and in places such as libraries. Neighbours and friends might also have heard of some things going on.

When going out for the day, it can often be best to take a picnic, since the food sold at places such as amusement parks and other touristy places and sporting events can be expensive; and obviously, multiplying that by the number of people who want food can make it add up to quite a hefty bill.

If possible, going on holiday at times other than peak season will be a way to reduce the financial burden, since the costs of a lot of things, from plane tickets to food, can be quite a bit lower then.

Booking holidays to popular places very early can often work out cheaper than waiting till nearer the time, if the intention is to go at a time when a lot of other people are likely to want to go, such as in the school holidays.

It can be cheaper to look for hotels that have large rooms, and then book one big room for a couple plus a few little children to sleep in, than booking a few rooms.

Bringing snacks for the children to eat while on holiday will cost a lot less than buying them in the hotel.

Renting a holiday apartment with another family or two that everyone gets on with can reduce the costs of a holiday. It'll be best to make rules in advance though about when it'll be each person's turn to help cook and clean, and what order people are going to shower in the morning in and so on, so as to try to reduce arguments.

Everyday Expenses

One thing Alvin Hall recommends is that people calculate how much they can reasonably afford to spend every day or every week, write it down on the back of an envelope, and then keep every single receipt they get for everything, and put them all in the envelope, and carry it around with them everywhere they go, and calculate how much they're spending on the back of the envelope, adding up the total each time they add a new figure, using the receipts to help them remember what the figures are. When they notice their spending's getting near the limit they've set for themselves, they'll likely start thinking a lot more carefully about whether to buy certain things, and their spending will slow down.

He recommends that one day a week could be declared a no-spending day, when people don't use any credit cards, or other kinds of cards, so spending on impulse becomes that much more difficult, so it'll be less likely.

He advises that people set a daily spending limit for themselves some days, and then don't take any more cash out with them than they've allowed themselves to spend when they set their daily spending limit, and also that they pay in cash more often, since it's apparently easier to blow money when using a credit card than it is when you can see the amount you're going to have to spend, and notice it diminishing right before your eyes, which might make you think twice about buying things you don't really need.

It's best to reduce the times when you go shopping without having definite plans in advance about what to buy, if possible, since it's easy to get carried away and buy things that look nice but aren't needed.

It could be good to look on the Internet to see how the prices of particular things compare online to what they are in the shops.

It can help to set a fixed maximum price you're willing to pay for any presents for relatives and friends, and not to go above it. Planning can start some way in advance, so if there's a sale on, and an item that would be a good buy appears in it, it can perhaps be bought then. And it's best to resist the temptation to buy something else for them to make up for the money saved.

Likewise, if ordinary household items can be bought in sales, such as sheets, towels, cutlery and so on, the money saved can be considered money for a rainy day, or for something else of importance, rather than money that's available to spend on a treat that won't last long, or more of the items on sale than you actually need or something.

Keep a regular check on how much money you have in your bank accounts, to make sure you don't go overdrawn and have to pay a fee because of it.

If there's something you often buy that you don't really need, but it's easy to give into temptation to get it, such as perhaps with fashionable clothes, you could set a maximum spending limit for the month, beyond which you vow not to go, and also try looking into ways of reducing the temptation to buy them.

Look at bank statements to find out and think over where a lot of your money goes, and whether there's anything it would be best if it didn't get spent on.

Household Essentials

One thing that can help is looking at the contracts of different providers of broadband, mobile phone, gas and electricity suppliers, insurance providers and so on, and switching to cheaper ones, or just going onto different tariffs. There's quite a bit of information online about the cheapest in the area, and comparing deals.

Energy-saving lightbulbs can help, both by lasting longer than ordinary ones, and by using less electricity.

You might find that even regularly turning down the heating a little bit can save a worthwhile amount of money.

With some newer biological washing powders, washing clothes at a lower temperature can get results that are just as good as washing at a higher one, while the washing machine doesn't use quite as much electricity, so it might be possible to save a little money that way over time.

When it's necessary to buy a new appliance like a washing machine, fridge and so on, check its energy-efficiency rating, since some use less electricity than others, so they cost less over time to run than others.

Some bank accounts pay more interest than others; so it's worth checking the rates, and putting any money that can be held in reserve for a while into a savings account with a higher interest rate than a current account will have.

Doing several of those things could add up to quite a saving over time.

Notes and Links